Double Role Of a Mother

A welcome song by excited friends, shrieks of happiness, mirthful laughter, and animated talks dislodged the calm that was prevalent at the home till then. It was a surprise welcome to our dear friend Priya, who had a pre-mature delivery – which tossed away our plans for a surprise baby shower party right out of the window. Each one of the ten-member girl gang was as excited as the second-time mother about the arrival of the new life.

Slowly, the atmosphere of elation gave way to warm hugs, broad smiles and baby language. After the madness settled in, all of us eased into the sofa and were engaged in bantering, all animated, nothing less for us, when the door-bell rang. Priya’s first born, Aryan, had come from school. Head slightly tilted and bent with a reluctant smile just about making an appearance on his lips he entered the house. His gait shouting, “Nothing affects me”, but his little eyes raised to scan the living room to catch a glimpse of his mother who was away from him in a hospital for delivery for close to 10 days. Even before his eyes could rest on her, he was bombarded with instructions, which came bellowing from the inside of the house - “Change your clothes”, “Wash your hands”, “Freshen up”, “Don’t go into the bedroom, the baby is sleeping,” from his father and grandparents.

He dragged himself off with heavy lingering steps as though he’s being peeled away from his mother. He made an entry after a few minutes, head still tilted and bent, a reluctant smile still playing on his lips, however now shoulders dropping too. As he was about to settle down in a chair, Priya, extended her arm and called out to him, and as if that was all the prodding he needed, Aryan quickly vaulted the hardly three-steps to reach his mother and snuggled up in her lap.  

A simple question from Priya “How are you and how was your day?” brought a radiant smile on Aryan’s face. He answered as if a barrage was broken. Their talk continued, while I watched the beautiful bond between a mother and son being laid out.  I also realized at that point Priya has a double role to play, a mother to an infant and a mother to a kid. Mind you, both are as different as chalk and cheese.

Miracles Happen Every Day

This incident was narrated to me by father-in-law almost 9 years back when I was a new bride. It’s still vivid in my memory - for it brings the humanness to the fore and of course the miracle.

It was in the year 1978. My father-in-law was transferred to the Air force base in Lohegaon, Pune. He and my mother-in-law had to share a quarters with another couple as a temporary arrangement (which well stretched to a few months) as my father-in-law was yet to get a quarter in his name. My parents-in-law, by virtue of regular transfers, were very well aware that it’s not an easy obligation to share a private space with total strangers, especially when the lady of the family is heavily pregnant. My in-laws very well understood the sacrifice of the sweet couple.

Days went by, things started to settle down and becoming mundane when one early Sunday morning the pregnant lady went into labor. Sensing the urgency her husband called out to my father-in-law for assistance and together rushed the lady to the air force hospital. However, on reaching the hospital the staff refused to admit the lady on the grounds that it’s a complicated case and that they are not equipped to handle the same and advised them to take her to another hospital. All appeals and explanation that the lady was already in labor fell on deaf ears. The men, based on the hospital staff suggestion decided to take the lady to another hospital and requested the air force hospital staff to provide them with an ambulance, which was again declined on official grounds.

Realizing the criticality of every minute getting ticked away, my father-in-law took charge of the situation and barged out of the hospital to get a cab / auto to take the lady to another hospital. After running on the streets for a few minutes trying to spot some type of transportation my father-in-law saw an air force jeep negotiating a turn. He ran towards the truck waving his hands vigorously and shouting to halt. The vehicle stopped and my father-in-law briefed him about the situation and the need to take the lady to a hospital immediately. The driver of the jeep expressed empathy but conveyed his inability to take the lady to the hospital as it required permissions and orders from his higher ups and that he was assigned to go to another part of the city. My father-in-law persisted and the driver of the truck agreed to drop them (the pregnant lady, her husband and father-in-law) mid-way – at Yerwada.

Not wasting a minute both the men got the pregnant lady into the jeep. Once inside the jeep my father-in-law was reduced to tears seeing the pain being endured by the lady, by the fact that this vehicle will not take the lady to hospital and also by the fear that it’s near impossible to get a transport on an early Sunday morning all the while fervently calling out to the lord in his heart.

The jeep reached the bare road of Yerwada. The men alighted and helped the lady to alight. And, as they turned around saw an auto standing beside them, the driver - a young, approximately 19 year old  boy ushering them hurriedly into the auto. The driver drove at top speed and halted the vehicle in front of Dr.Purohit’s Hospital in Deccan Gymkhana.

The lady was rushed to the labor room and she delivered within 5mts – reason enough for the attending doctor to get wild at both the men and give a piece of his mind, obviously not knowing the background.

Tired and relieved my father-in-law traced his steps towards the hospital entrance to pay the auto driver. But he did not find the auto or the auto driver. He hurriedly walked out of the hospital gate, engulfed with the guilt of not paying the auto driver, hoping to see the auto on the road but there too he was met with disappointment.

In my father-in-law’s words, ‘The young auto driver who appeared from nowhere at the desolate road of Yerwada and vanished from the hospital entrance without waiting to collect his bill is the Lord himself." Nothing short of a miracle and is the Lord himself.”

I want to sleep alone!!

That night i tucked my 7 year old daughter to bed and settled down next to her to read out a story. Even before i start, she says with a sparkle in her eyes, "Mumma from tomorrow I want to sleep alone in my bedroom." The adult in me made me keep a calm face and even encourage her to do so. But the heart of a mother missed a beat and a zillion thoughts ran through the mind. Does she really want to sleep alone? Why does she want to sleep alone? Will she be able to sleep all alone? What if she wakes up in the middle of the night? What if she has a bad dream? What if she needs a glass of water? What if !!! and the thoughts ran berserk until the last thought that put me at ease - it's just a innocent statement made before going off to sleep and which she will forget about the next morning.
Oh! did I miss mentioning that my daughter sleeps with my husband and I in our bedroom, and we absolutely love it?

Next morning as i get her ready for the school she looks at me and requests, "Will you arrange my bed beautifully, I want to have my afternoon nap in my room?" Oh my God she's not forgotten about the last night's talk. She really is serious about sleeping alone. The adult in me flashes a smile and says yes, while the heart of a mother saddens. Did i miss mentioning she takes her afternoon nap also with me in my bedroom?

I arrange her bed as requested and as feared she enters her bedroom for the afternoon nap. She asks me to read out a story which I promptly do and then move softly over to my room. Within seconds I hear soft movements and a surge of happiness engulfs me, she's coming back. And there she walks in through the door saying "momma aap ke bina need nahi aa raha hai". Yay!! my heart did a somersault. I hugged her tight and we both went off to sleep.

That evening when my husband is back from his business trip I relate the talk that our daughter did. He dismissed it with a wave of hand. Tired soon he went off to sleep while my daughter kept her word and walked into her bedroom and lay on the bed. I read out a story and she slowly slipped into sleep.  My husband unaware of the developments lay asleep on the bed in our bedroom.

He woke up startled after some time, checks the bed next to him and asks "Where's Amu?",  Sleeping in her room, I reply. His jaw dropped, not believing what he just heard and checks our daughter's room and comes back with 'I still can't believe' look and lies down. That night he rushed to her room many times at the slightest sounds. Hmmm! A big change for us.

Next morning my better half engages in a talk with our daughter, confident that he can convince her to change her mind and sleep with us. He valiantly asks "Did you you sleep well Amu? you can continue to sleep with us if you want to." To which our daughter responded excitedly, Oh! I had a wonderful sleep Papa, I enjoyed sleeping alone. My husband immediately went meek and struck a deal with her. The deal is that Amu will sleep in her bedroom Monday to Friday and on Saturday and Sunday she will sleep with us in our bedroom.

Till now Amu is honouring the deal.

Am Very Happy!!

I am happy!! Happy is an understatement. I am on Cloud 9...I finally tracked down my classical dance teacher of 12 years, Manjula Srinivas. It was relentless efforts of close to a year which saw the results on last Thursday. I spoke to her over phone, she had the same firm yet vulnerable voice. We enquired about each other's well being and how life has treated over the years... I lost touch with her for the last 10 years. A lot has changed for her.... some good and some bad.

But the entire experience of finding her and talking to her made me immensely happy. In fact, so happy was I that I was literally jumping much to the amusement of my little one. And my act also called in a comment from my husband, which went like this - you are insanely happy! :)

Am back!

I was away for a long time. Work and pesonal front and then a travel to the US for business had me occupied enough that i did not manage to squeze in time to blog.

I have so much to share and so much catching up to do :) I believe I will cope.

Madhubala and Marilyn Monroe in my living room

These two drop dead gorgeous ladies are in my living room. Sitting daintly on my sofa. Ok. Out I come from my dream world, but when I spotted these cushion covers I set my heart on them and knew where exactly they would find place.

I have placed the cushion cover of Madhubala right opposite the entrance. So, it gives an impression as if she's lifting her ghunghat to catch a glimpse who's walking in :) I love the feeling.

And, what do I say about Marilyn Monroe. She just perks up the entire room.

I spotted these colourful mini cushions at a store in a mall and fell head-over-heels in love. So out they followed me from the store to my home :)

And now for a complete picture of how these lil beauties compete with the other two beauties to grab all the eyballs.

Dust it off the candles

I picked up this tip on my last visit to Goa. The housekeeping staff left a neatly designed note after they were done with their job.

The note had a tip on how to remove the dust that has settled on candles. And here, am sharing it with you all.

Using a wet cloth to remove the dust off the wax is not a good idea. The dust just plays around and never comes off the candle. Here's what you need to do. Take a cotton ball and dampen it with a lil alcohol (sneak a lil from your husband's treasured bottles and for those whose husbands do not indulge in alcohol, get yourself minitaure bottles) and wipe the candles. See the dust come off the candles and stuck to the cotton ball.

I tried it...both, sneaking alcohol from my husband's bottles and wiping the candles with them :)
It works.